My book, “Grass Is Greener Syndrome: Relationships, Commitment, Perfectionism, and the Life-Changing Fear of Missing Out” is now available! For those who are new to this topic, Grass Is Greener Syndrome is an issue I’ve specialized in working with in my therapy and coaching practice, and have researched for many years. It is a phenomenon that many people face — often with respect to relationships, career/jobs, or where to live — that makes it difficult to settle down in life, even when wanting to. It can often feel like there’s something better you’re missing out on. You may be existing with one foot out the door of your relationships and even when a situation seems to be ideal at first, once the grass is greener cycle sets in, you start to feel doubt in your relationship until eventually you decide to start over to find the next better option.
For people who struggle with grass is greener tendencies, it can be a torturous tug-of-war feeling like the “next” person or place (or even a previous one) is where the happiness and fulfillment is waiting, while often feeling underwhelmed, disappointed, unsatisfied, or bored in the present. In the moment, it often feels like where you are isn’t good enough and it’s hard to avoid the lure of the fantasies of the better life waiting for you elsewhere. The repetition of this cycle can lead people into depression, hopelessness, and anxiety, and also result in decision-making paralysis, potentially feeling like a passenger in your own life.
The book goes into depth to show how Grass Is Greener Syndrome has generally been building for a long period of time when the cycle starts actively impacting people’s lives, and how it has a way of combining various areas of struggle into one place. Things that have been touched upon in previous articles — such as the starvation of needs, and the grip of nostalgia — will be expanded upon in greater depth, while also exploring numerous elements of this issue haven’t been shared before. The book also includes (confidentiality-protected) stories of people who have struggled and worked through Grass Is Greener Syndrome.
It is possible to overcome Grass Is Greener Syndrome, and I have seen many people work through this issue. It can often feel hopeless for people while in the grip of the cycle and continuing to play it out over and over. The first step is just becoming aware that there is a pattern leading you to chronically starting over in areas of life where you want to settle down. Reach out if you wish to discuss your situation and to start moving forward.
Order the book or read on Kindle now: Grass Is Greener Syndrome: Relationships, Commitment, Perfectionism, and the Life-Changing Fear of Missing Out
