‘Grass is Greener’ syndrome is a really tough and paralyzing cycle for many people who struggle with this issue. It can make people feel that they are never fully settled in life, repeatedly experiencing urges to find the better thing they are missing out on, leading to a pattern of changing relationships, careers, where to … More Grass is Greener Syndrome: Euphoric Memories and Craving
Movies can create the impression that when two people are in-love they should always be lost in each other’s gaze, smiling when they look at each other, or constantly in a state of “no, you hang up first”. Sex happens slowly in front of a fireplace while you, again, gaze deeply into each other’s eyes … More Love — It Isn’t What You Think
Based on my previous post about the usefulness and necessity of anger at one’s therapist in the treatment — rather than abandoning the treatment in these moments — it was brought to my attention that a follow-up could be helpful to explore when switching therapists may be a good decision. It can’t be overstated how complicated of … More When is it Time to Change Therapists?
How many times have you ended a relationship and continued to be at least somewhat involved with your ex? At first, there is the pain, or the relief, the anger, sadness, etc. But as time goes by, people often end up drifting back together — they start talking, having sex, spending time together, and soon … More Relationship Breakups: The Commitment to Separation
There are many perspectives on why relationships don’t always last, and more than one theory has validity to it. I’m going to present a theory I call the “broken mirror” theory. Attraction has many levels to it, as well as a deep psychology underlying what draws us to certain people. But one general concept seems … More Why Relationships Break Up
What does that even mean, anyway…life is a fluid? (Some may prefer to say “liquid”, but I’m sticking with “fluid”). People often perceive life as a series of idealized milestone events, all of which have general time markers on them. Some learn to drive around age 16-18; at 18 they graduate high school and maybe … More Life Is a Fluid, Not a Solid
Relationships all have their bumpy moments. Some happen more than others, but relationships that last are able to move forward from these moments without getting caught up in the bumps for lengthy periods of time. One of the notable issues I’ve witnessed time and again in my practice are opposing (and complementary) processes that often … More Ending Arguments